Church Shopping
How does one find the perfect church for you?
Does the one that you walk into for the first time, just happen to be a perfect fit?
Does the first person you go on a date with in life become your husband or wife?
No.
It is pretty rare in any aspect of life that things are a perfect fit or a perfect match the first try.
In life there are always trials and errors.
Often when people decide to begin a religious journey or when one wakes up one Sunday and decide that today is going to be the day that they attend church… then the church they attend doesn’t feel right. Often people don’t attempt again for a long time as a result.
Don’t give up!
You don’t give up on a new romantic relationship or career path that quickly. Sometimes the key is shopping around. Church shopping.
The first step in finding a church that may be a perfect fit for you, is identifying what you want out of your experience. It is difficult to begin a religious journey when you do not know what you are looking for.
What do you want in a church? What is it that you are looking for?
Do you want fellowship or do you want to quietly sit in the back row?
Do you want a beautiful building that you may get married in one day or do you want an outdoor parking lot?
Do you want a traditional service or a contemporary service? Do you have a specific religious denomination in mind?
Once you have pinpointed what it is that you are searching for, it is time to go shopping.
Your church shopping process might take you a few weeks or a few months. You might even try the same church a couple times, before continuing to shop around. You may also want to try one church’s traditional service one week and then the same church’s modern service the following week. It is important that wherever you land, that you feel comfortable in your setting. Your perfect fit may not match your neighbors and that’s ok!
My religious path in Myrtle Beach:
Belin United Methodist– Belin Memorial is located in the heart of Murrells Inlet. It is very family-oriented, it has a good mix of a lot of elderly members and a lot of young families. Belin offers both a traditional service (The Sanctuary) in their traditional church and a modern service (The Harbor) across the street in their Family Life Center. I LOVE the music at both locations/services. Behind the physical church, Belin has a cross overlooking the marsh water that is breath-taking. Before the pandemic hit, I was considering traveling with Belin on their ZOE Empowers Mission Trip abroad to Africa. Belin Memorial has good energy.
The Rock– The Rock is located in Conway. While I have never personally attended a Sunday service at the Rock, I have heard many praises. If churches could be trending… then this one currently is! It is a goal of mine to get up to Conway and try a Sunday service out! The Rock has two locations- one in what I call Coastal Conway (CCU area) and one that I call Conway-Conway. The Rock also has a Coffee Bar that the church runs called C3 Coffee Bar. An Anyor location is set to open soon. They have a large number of singles and younger members! I participate in The Rock’s Wildflower Woven Women’s small group study of Jesus & Women.
Elevation Church Online– watch now!
Midtown Vineyard– The Vineyard is located in downtown Myrtle Beach, across the large parking from Rockin’ Jump. Midtown Vineyard was holding one service in their backlot for outdoors social distancing during the majority of the pandemic closures and beyond. You could bring your own beach chair or borrow a chair if needed. They recently just moved back inside and split into two services for indoor social distancing. Midtown has a wide mix of members, ranging from young to old, singles to families, and is truly welcome to all! The Vineyard is growing rapidly right now, so it is a great time to check it out. The Vineyard brings me the feeling of family. I don’t have any (birth) family in Myrtle Beach, but the community feel and sense of belonging at the Vineyard truly makes me feel not only welcomed but appreciated. The word of God and the message from the bible somehow keeps getting better each week.
More than one church? Why is this frowned upon? It is funny how sometimes church can feel like the most judgmental place of them all. But what will my church think if I “cheat” on them and attend another church! It is 90% in your head. If you want to branch out, branch out. Different churches can offer you different pieces that you may need for your puzzle. One might provide you with leadership and another might provide you with fellowship. That is okay. It is okay to not follow the status quo, paths in life (especially religious ones) aren’t straight and narrow anymore.
A great book that my therapist had me read is called Boundaries. It is important that you have healthy boundaries in your life. My therapist liked this book specifically because it mixes psychology with religion. Right in the beginning, it addresses that sometimes the hardest place to have healthy boundaries is the church! It is okay to say no to the church, just like it is okay to praise God in different churches. Go and attend wherever your heart desires and whenever it desires it.
Further your experience on your own or congruently with your new church by:
Grabbing yourself a new bible–
Grabbing yourself a new notebook–
Daily Devotionals:
My journey:
I grew up in the church. I conveniently had a Methodist church that was walking distance from my house. I sang in my youth group band and participated in a young teenage girl’s small group called Serenity.
*Unfortunately for the small group leaders, it turned into a teenage girl’s therapy group, but the leaders loved us and we loved them.
When I moved from VA to SC, not only was I focused on not drowning in college with my first fall semester of 19 credit hours, but I didn’t know where to start in continuing my religious journey. Most freshmen in college had other priorities! I tried one church with a girlfriend in Fantasy Harbor and hated it. The music was outstanding! Probably the best worship that I had ever witnessed in person, but I hated the delivery of the message. Also, the physical building was an auditorium setup that gave me “show-vibes”. It didn’t feel authentic at that time, it didn’t feel right for me. Essentially I gave up because I wasn’t willing to go church shopping to find my perfect fit. So, I continued my collegiate career without a church. I began my teaching career without a church. Soon, eight years passed by and I hadn’t found a church in Myrtle Beach and had lost my deep connection to my religion.
I began church shopping in January of 2019. I shopped around at three different Methodist churches and six different services before finding one that felt right for me. I landed at the contemporary service called the Harbor at Belin United Methodist Church in Murrells Inlet, SC. Each week, I sat in either the last row or the side bleachers in the back. At one point in 2019, they brought in a religious comedian who even made fun of the people sitting in the last row… I laughed so hard and felt like I was in the right place, even in the last row.
It took me a while to feel comfortable enough with my religious footprint to fully immerse myself into the church. I started attending Belin Memorial in April of 2019 and didn’t reach out to join their worship team until September of 2019. A full year later from the start of my church shopping journey, I sang in the worship band at Belin United Methodist in January 2020. I feel most connected to God when I am singing. Prior to church shopping, my church was in my car with my individual radio worship. But, when I finally felt like I had religious roots again, is when the pandemic hit.
Like many, I struggled with participating in church virtually. I had many friends who were drawn to Elevation Worship Online and loved it. Like most everyone else, I love the music that Elevation Worship produces. Luckily, I heard that a church downtown had just moved their service outside to their back parking lot, where you could bring your own beach chair and socially distance. I was very skeptical at first, but I went and instantly fell in love. After about a solid five minutes, I decided that Midtown Vineyard was the perfect fit for me and I finally found my church home here in Myrtle Beach.
Church shopping is an on-going process. Even if you have found a church, it is okay to change it up! God is everywhere and church does not have to be any one place.
In September, The Rock Church in Conway held an event called WILDFLOWER WEDNESDAY, an event for women to worship. Over 400 women from the Myrtle Beach area attended the event. I did not know about the event and had some serious fomo afterwards when I saw it trending on my social media feed (follow @wildflower_woven). I started following The Rock Church to make sure I didn’t miss something great like this in our community again! I am glad that I did, because this winter I joined a small group with The Rock Church to participate in their Jesus & Women bible study! Over 100 women are participating in this study through The Rock.
Now, I am lucky to say I have religious roots in Murrells Inlet, Myrtle Beach, and Conway. I am thankful for my journey, it is only just beginning. God is good.
My fifty favorite worship songs:
- Graves into Gardens– Elevation Worship & Brandon Lake
- Do It Again– Elevation Worship
- Promises– Maverick City Music (feat. Joe L Barnes & Naomi Raine)
- When I Lock Eyes With You– Maverick City Music & Upperroom
- You Keep On Getting Better– Maverick City Music
- Rise Up (Lazarus)– CAIN
- Way Maker– Leeland
- Just Be Held– Casting Crowns
- Lifesong– Casting Crowns
- Praise You in this Storm– Casting Crowns
- There Was Jesus– Zach Williams & Dolly Parton
- You Hold It All– Futures
- Together– For King & Country, Tori Kelly, & Kirk Franklin
- Rescue– Lauren Daigle
- Rebel Heart– Lauren Daigle
- Love Like This– Lauren Daigle
- Come Alive (Dry Bones)– Lauren Daigle
- O’Lord– Lauren Diagle
- You Say– Lauren Daigle
- Peace Be Still– The Belonging Co & Lauren Diagle
- Beautiful Story– The Belonging Co & Mia Fieldes
- Wildflowers– Brandon Lake
- House of Miracles– Brandon Lake
- Another in the Fire– Taya & Hillsong United
- Alive & Breathing– Matt Maher
- This Could Change Everything– Francesca Battistelli
- Defender– Francesca Battistelli (feat. Steffany Gretzinger)
- Surrounded (Fight My Battles)– Bethel Music & Kari Jobe
- Jesus, We Love You– Bethel Music & Paul McClure
- It is Well– Bethel Music & Kristene DiMarco
- Goodness of God– Bethel Music & Jenn Johnson
- Start Over– Flame (feat. NF)
- Haven’t Seen It Yet– Danny Gokey
- Love Will Take You Places– Danny Gokey
- Throne Room Song– People & Songs feat. May Angeles, Ryan Kennedy, & The Emerging Sound
- Something in the Water– Carrie Underwood
- How Great Thou Art– Carrie Underwood
- Holy is the Lord/Hosanna– Caleb and Kelsey
- Into the Battle– Upperroom
- Blessings– Laura Story
- The Blessing– Kari Jobe, Cody Carnes & Elevation Worship
- What a Beautiful Name (Gospel Version)– Hillsong Worship
- Oceans (Where Feet May Fail)– Hillsong
- So Will I (100 Billion X)– Hillsong
- I Can Only Imagine– MercyMe
- How Great is Our God– Chris Tomlin
- Indescribable– Chris Tomlin
- Tin Roof– Chris Tomlin (feat. Blessing Offor)
- BE THE MOON– Chris Tomlin (feat. Brett Young & Cassadee Pope)
- MAKER OF THE MOON– Elle Limebear
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